The journey to independence and autonomy: 

The formative years of a child’s life, particularly entering pre-teen to teenage years, are a time of intense growth, not only physically but emotionally and intellectually. It’s important to remember that this stage is when your child is at their most energetic, thoughtful, and idealistic self. For parents who have a deaf or hard of hearing child these years can be a period of conflict between parent and child, but they are also a time to help kids grow into distinct and independent adults. 

Like all on the journey to independence and autonomy, young people who are deaf and hard-of-hearing want to develop their own community of peers. A great way for deaf teens and kids to connect with their peers is through the pursuit of their passions, such as sports, hobbies, and the arts.  

At every age and stage of life, community is vital for the growth and well-being of every deaf, deafblind and hard-of-hearing child to shape their identity and connections to peers with shared experiences.  

Indy’s Story: 

Indy, a deaf teenager, emphasised the importance of building out her community and having a family that valued her independence..  

“I realised that the people around me a lot of the time would help me. When you’re growing up with hearing loss, you learn to be mature and find out what’s good for you and what’s not. So when my parents were worried about something that could happen, it was important to remind them that I knew what I could handle. I know what’s good and bad for me, and it’s great to trust in your kid.”

Empowering your child: 

Indy’s mother stated that there are so many incredible things that come with having a deaf child, and she’s learnt to be a strong advocate for her daughter. 

“I’ve had to learn to stand up for Indy to make sure that she gets what she needs. I was always very shy when I was younger, so I’ve developed this self-confidence and ability to advocate for my daughter, which has been fantastic.

It can be upsetting at times when you see them struggling and getting upset about things that they can’t do or that they’re missing out on. But then there are so many awesome things as well.

The school was really great and willing to help wherever they could. We also had support teachers supporting and backing us up on that level. Academically, she’s been thriving and doing so well. The support has helped her to reach her full potential.”

The power of advocating at school 

Indy recalls how a supportive environment where teachers adjusted their communication to suit her needs made a major difference.  

“Definitely in the classroom there were times where I struggled to hear when the teacher was turned around or if the classroom was noisy. I had some great teachers who made sure that they were facing me most of the time.” 

“And around bigger groups of people, I found it harder to socialise with my hearing aids because I would struggle to hear. But once I was with my friends, I was a regular crazy kid.” 

“We’re very proud of Indy. She’s an amazing person,” Indy’s mother said. 

“She’s got such great resilience. She self-advocates and shows so much maturity and independence at such a young age, which is fantastic. My hopes for Indy as she gets older are the same as any parent. It’s that she’s happy and healthy and that she gets to achieve what she wants to achieve and doesn’t think that her hearing will hold her back.”

The importance of community 

Naomi, a Teacher of Deaf Adults, shared her experience of growing up as the only Deaf person in her family and the importance of finding a community, with the encouragement and advocacy from her mother. 

“When I was growing up, I had my mother, father, and brother who were all hearing, and I was the only Deaf person. So I used hearing aids, I was trained using oral methods, and I went to a mainstream school that didn’t have any sign language. And I thought I was okay, and I did well. It was normal for me. It wasn’t until I was thirteen that my mother started noticing I was struggling. Any time there was a group of people, I’d miss information, and I wouldn’t understand what was happening. So my mother encouraged me to go to a Deaf group.”

Naomi stated that eventually finding Deaf peers with shared lived experiences increased her sense of belonging and connection to the world. 

“It’s so important to have a community, especially for young ones. It’s about having that community, supporting each other, feeling that connection, and understanding that we have the same barriers and the same experiences.

And then seeing others navigate that and overcome those obstacles gives you a sense of confidence and reminds kids that they can do that too. You don’t feel so alone in the world.”

Today, Naomi teaches Deaf adults and finds joy in empowering them. 

“At the moment, I’m teaching basic literacy and computer skills along those lines. I love my job. I love being able to show these Deaf people that I’m a Deaf person, and I’m working. I want to show and encourage them that they can be independent. They can achieve anything”

Advocating for your deaf child 

Allowing children to advocate for themselves and make their own decisions goes hand in hand with being aware of the available resources and supports, and helping them access these opportunities. 

Empowering deaf children is about fostering a strong sense of identity, building supportive environments, and connecting with a community that understands their unique experiences. Parents play a crucial role in this journey, and their advocacy not only empowers their children but also transforms them into confident and resilient people of tomorrow. 

Want to see more resources for parents of deaf kids through early intervention to teenage years? Click here

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